A Shared Name

(March 7, 2018)

Youngest of five, older than four

First there were boys, she, the first girl

Played with their Legos, dressed in their shorts

She was a tomboy, loved all the same sports

Mama said there had been one before

Baby would have been her number four

Cleaning the windows till pain in her side

Red filled the water, water filled her eyes

If she was a girl her name would be mine

Brother sang about her, his own little rhyme

He said that all was good and all was okay

Because "Leah was found in heaven that day"

But my name is Leah and I’m still alive 

Too soon to tell what the baby was inside

My brain keeps repeating again and again

“I wonder who I would be, and who you would have been”

My life would have changed, my name would be different 

An older sister can change things, I guess quite a bit

If you were a girl, I now carry your name

We'll share it together; I won't bring it to shame.